Screw the Schedule: On Embracing the Unknown

Screw the Schedule: On Embracing the Unknown

Photography by Paolo Raeli

We are in the midst of summer, fully accustomed to the sticky heat, our hearts lost in long, lazy afternoons. Now, I am a dreamer when it comes to adventures. Maybe it's my love for contemporary novels, but I spent hours this school year thinking about all the potential this break holds. I went into summer with no plan, polar to my usual over-organizing tendencies. I wanted to embrace whatever was thrown my way with open arms, without the confinements of breaking schedule. All of my peers had some sort of concrete plan: volunteering, working, etc. I was the only one who had nothing.

After my two week road trip, I spent a week and a half cooped up in my room doing absolutely nothing: lounging around on my bed, wasting my hours on the internet, and staring at the ceiling in boredom. I even called one of my friends late at night, worried that I would misuse my entire summer. I thought that I had made a grave mistake by not planning my summer like I usually do.

My disappointment changed within just a few days. All of a sudden, I had an internship that I was genuinely passionate about; I was dancing the night away at a BØRNS concert; I was walking along the beach at midnight with one of my close friends; I was catching up with someone and realizing that she was different, in the most worldly and beautiful way; I was proven wrong. 

My summer did not need more planning - it needed more saying yes.

When you see these unforeseen opportunities, you have to grab them, you have to shake them by the shoulders and scream, "Yes, I am taking you, and I am never letting go."A certain level of planning is needed for stability, but sometimes you need to accept the chaos. Looking back on my summer, I have realized just how magical these months have been. From stripping naked on a mountain to making out with a stranger to exploring (trespassing) Sunken City, I am living fully. Instead of wondering whether adventures will come, I'm texting all of my friends begging them to go to a fashion show with me that is three hours away. I'm attending salsa festivals. I'm running 5k's and learning how to surf and shooting a gun for the first time. I'm creating the adventures,

Take your calendar, with your carefully planned routine, and throw it away. To hell with schedules, this time is yours.

LA, NY

LA, NY

you're so LA and I'm moving to New York next year,
but I've been told I'm so Los Angeles too.
the whole thing about opposites attracting,
is it applicable here?
because I want to make out with you, and hell,
I've never felt like this before.
I'd drive cross country to feel your facial hair on my neck.
I'm so fucking bored without you driving me around aimlessly
under pinkish purplish perfect skies
in a city that neither of us really belong in at all.
your hair is not easy for me to run my hands through and it's frustrating sometimes,
but it smells like chocolate and you small like daydreams because you are one.
we wear all black and our breath is minty
from all the fucking Marlboros that I swore I'd never lay a hand on
but that you made feel so right.
fuck you.
turn me on at thrift stores, turn me on by kissing my neck
our first kiss was after discussing Stephen King

an omen of sorts.
his stories never end well,
and we could say no different.